2013 didn’t bring too much good news either, it started with a surgery that took away my well being and brought pain and suffering that I never experienced before. Later, in the middle of a building project to expand our house, the family business crushed, leaving most of our extended family members with no income, and with heaps of hard feelings and blame to go around.

Watching years of work crumble into dust; I felt deep and paralyzing fear, for the first time in many years. Fear of losing everything we worked for, fear of losing my family, and the ultimate primal fear of pain and even death. Well… it was a new experience.

I remember days of being so depressed and full of fear that I could hardly breathe. The only moments that brought peace, were the moments of deep focus. I started to do my list everywhere; in the streets, in the bank, when stopping in traffic lights… I would do my Neighborhood Walk® with deep focus because they allowed me to shut down my suffering personality and get a few more moments in that quiet place. Ramtha is right… fear and suffering are great motivators for change, when my personality becomes unbearable, I release as much of it as I can – and change.

The disciplines also helped me to surrender to the reality I created for myself. I observe my fears and my worries with detachment, and see clearly what my thoughts are made of and how they created this reality. It was and still is a long journey.

One of the lower points of this dark time, when I really felt that I hit rock bottom, was when I realized that I cannot afford to pay for my son’s motor-skills therapy. I was sitting there, waiting for my son to finish his last session and everything seemed without hope.

That was also the moment that everything changed. Just like Ramtha’s epic “Safe Future-Now Process” when the earth is trembling all around, I suddenly found myself in a safe place, with a ray of light shining in.

In that darkest moment, rhymes started playing in my head, about smiling and daring and defying fear and despair. And this little girl appeared in my head, with her radiant smile.

All I needed to do was to write everything down and draw tet images that were playing in my head. I rediscovered my drawing skills, and found rhyming skills I never knew I had. I managed to put my worries aside and immerse myself in creation – it was healing.

The book is based on a process I had developed for my son, to help him overcome fears and difficulties. Looking back, I think that the principle is very similar to Ramtha’s teachings about dragging our fears and addictions into the light and taking a good look at them, face them, so we can release them. I taught my son to draw his fear or unpleasant emotion as a monster, then find the monster’s weak spot and use it to conquer it, usually in a funny way. We called this process “Draw Me A Monster”.

We learned at RSE that “What fires together, wires together” – according to this principle, associating between a fear with a funny image can cause the funny image to “fire” with the fear, effectively neutralizing it.

We had a lot of fun doing this process, using humor and imagination to conquer whatever was troubling him, and it worked very well, he was able to overcome many fears, and troubling emotions.
When my book was complete, I decided against my usual timid and cautious identity that was pushing me to keep it safe in a folder forever – and published it on Amazon for the whole world to see…